Death & Life

It’s been about a month since Chet, my brother-in-law died at 45 of cancer and over a year since my dad died of another cancer… life has taken on a certain immediacy; just the other day, mom had me and my brother going through dad’s closet looking at shirts/shoes I might need- always thought it convenient we (that’s dad and his two sons) were roughly the same size. I had completely put out of my mind that my mom still had all these clothes that my brother and I had jokingly referred to as “must-steals” when dad would hold it up out of the gift box on some Christmas morning. We told stories; many were the familiar and a surprising number were newly delicious. The night ended with me muscling hangers and bags heavy with memories, “stealing away with the must-steals,” a pun I can just hear my dad saying. And I realize as I write this, I have managed to wear something of dad’s every day since. I guess I always will.